Grimwell's New and Improved Darktide Newbie Guide

Allright kids, listen up. Uncle Grimwell's going to go over this one more time. He's even going to update this damn thing so it's reflective of the times here on Darktide. Grab a chair and start reading. Don't just read though, get that doughnut between yer ears working and think about what I say and why I might say it. I'm going to be a little short on this one, Uncle Jack has taken a walk and I haven't bothered to find him yet.

More and more people are coming to Darktide these days. We've had an invasion from Leafcull, and absorbed those that could adjust. We have recently been threatened by a Frostfell invasion, but the most of what I have seen is a few posts looking to buy accounts instead of earning levels. Those guys will make great Bloods.

Thing is, most of the people giving Darktide a chance are STILL doing it wrong, and wondering why they find themselves kissing the Lifestone so damn much. Well here it is, your new and improved comprehensive guide to why Darktide is a great server and yer only getting your card punched because ye ask for it.


You damn well better have some. There are some people out there like myself that can play solo and get by ok. We are a rare breed and really should die out. I don't play well with other people, especially in PVP. I tend to nail my buddy instead of the enemy because I don't get much practice working with others. So the first thing you need is friends. Talk to your monarchy on whatever server you play on ( you HAVE learned the game as a Care Bear right?? Good.) Find a few people who want to give DT a try with ya. Come in all at the same time at the same place and have a plan.

I think the smallest unit to smart with that is viable and effective is a quartet. Pick one guy to be the "leader" and build a mini monarchy. Have the "monarch" make a trade mule character. Cooking, Fletching, and Alchemy. All traiend. Plus Creature magic for self buffing. Then train Leadership followed by whatever you wish with the remaining points. This character should NEVER be thought of as an "active" character. Therefore it doesn't have to follow the "survival" rules of the server. You are then going to swear everyone else to this character and funnel it exp for the rest of time as you know it. In this way, after you get the levels and start doing the crafting quests, you don't have to pay Sagacious for all his wonderful skills. Crank your monarch up and then have him do it.


Ok, so you have a monarch built, log it off somewhere and forget about it for the next 20 levels. The most important thing for your "real" characters is that they have a focus. Wake up kids, this is REALLY important. The decisions you make at character creation are the MOST IMPORTANT ONES YOU EVER MAKE. You screw it up now and you'll be rerolling later. Trust me. I've rerolled more than once. "How do I get a good template Uncle Grimwell?" Good question kid! Yer thinking aren't ya? Well, start out by deciding what you want to be. Mage, Melee, or Archer. Then look at what makes a good mage/melee/archer. Focus in on that. Note that common theory on Darktide is that ALL characters need Life Magic, so concider that when you make the character template.

Got a base template idea? Good! Now share it with your buddies. Review each others' work and make suggestions. Remember you are a TEAM. You will rely upon each other in the future, so work hard right now to open your mind to what the other guy thinks about your template. Ok, everyone has looked over each others templates and suggested some changes. Now make a few. There. Now you have a revised template. It should be better if you have friends who know what they are doing. Yer not done yet though! Ohhh no, now it's time to face the masses.

Take that template and post it on a message board or two. Be ready for some extra smart and personal jerk to tell you that you are a dumbass or are just "gay" for trying. Look beyond it. Read EVERY reply that you get. Then think about the good ones, there will be one or two. Read them a few times and try to see what the different suggestions being made are focused on. Also compare other templates being posted and the responses they get. Then take it back to yours and make some changes.

All done? Good! Now it's almost time to make your characters! The four of you will soon be wreaking havoc on drudges everywhere! I can hear their cat like wails now! Muhahahahaha. Ok, yer still going to be a gimp, even with a good template. Because you are going to be level 1. So get AC Explorer (Uncle Grimwell swears by this one) and start doing some virtual scouting. Find a place that has a good lifestone and either a nearby portal to a town, or an out of the way merchant. Find the nearest starter town. Talk it over with your buds and agree on the "one" leveling spot and then plan how you get there.

THEN you can go make your character. You've got a template that should be functionable in the long term if you listened to others; you've got a good starting spot; and a place to sell. Get on that game and make your character baby! Don't forget to swear to that monarch character, or you'll look silly trying to level a handicapped monarch so your main can swear to it later...

Don't stop reading you whelp! Look down, I still got lots to say and at least one more word is going to be worth it all.


I still find it faster to do this by myself. No waiting for someone to catch up with me. No recovering their corpses. Downtime is time not spent leveling. Trust me, if you HATE powerleveling and don't like getting killed every five minutes, don't come to Darktide. If you don't mind powerleveling as a necessity, come on over. Cause if you don't powerlevel, yer going to die every 5 mintues to a PK.

Even though I can powerlevel faster alone, I would suggest that you stick with the team you are coming in with and fight as a team. Why? Well you might be able to take on one or two bigger critters early and get better team based exp. You will level more evenly and everyone will be able to play together. These are nice things, but what is MOST IMPORTANT is that you will be able to fight as one team. When the time comes to PVP this is going to be a major factor. Four people who can work as a team without effort are going to waste people who can't. That's just how it is. So a little slowdown on the leveling, and time spent waiting for Ugly Bob to come back for his corpse will eventually mold your little band into a strong fighting machine. So train as a team and you'll fight as one. Get Roger Wilco running and use it. Save your fingers the typing. That will make you even more effective. Again, trust me on this. Work like this from the start and when it's time to beat on people, you will do so soundly.

Back to the Basics.

A few things need to be refreshed. I see a lot of people breaking fundamental rules all the time and it burns me up.

1. Town is for shopping, NOT socializing. If you want to talk and make snow angels, find a hill that is 5 clicks from anywhere and then do it. DO NOT stand in town wagging your tongue with no buffs. If you do, don't cry to me when someone comes into town and kills you. You are asking for it and it's your own damn fault.

2. Metallic armor blows chunks. Melee guys, take note. I see more and more people running around in metal armor. Yer asking for it. You do realise that this makes some elemental attacks do MORE damage to you??? Really. Leathers might be ugly, but I'd take a grommie coat on a melee guy before platemail any day. Save up and get gemstone armor when you are bigger, but leave that metal armor in the shops. Trust me. You'll be rich just from selling all that metallic loot you find.

3. Have a plan. When you are shopping, blow through town, sell all your junk as fast as you can, and buy what you know you need. Don't spend 30 minutes ID'ing crap at the armorer. Go in and get all your loot sold, buy spell components, healing potions, and healing kits. THEN hit the armor guy and check for a specific piece of merchandise ("I really need elemental sowrds, I need a new breastplate" etc.) if you don't find it, get out of town. Mages do the same but at least it's all at one shop.

4. If there are people standing around town gabbing and pretending it's safe. Be sure to say "hi" when they greet you. Then get out of town FAST. I call this the "Bait Factor". The higher the volume of unbuffed people standing in a town chatting, the higher the chance of a PK coming in looking for some sweet meat. So if town is crowded it's time to get out of town.

5. The longer you spend in town, the less time you spend leveling. Leveling is the God here. Sorry but it is the way the game works. Get your levels and get it over with.

Ok enough basics, you should know this already, but many seem not to. On to the biggest one eyed monster on this server.


If you and your friends come in as a small team, start powerleveling like mad and frequent the same town, eventually someone's going to notice and ask "Who's Bob" about the monarch name you have. When this happens, be ready. It's a trap. They ask, "who's that monarch" and you say "He's my friend, we came over from the Safedown server". They will then say "Cool, you guys are new to the area?" (note that even if you have more levels than the person asking, you will be the "new one" :p ). You say "Well yeah, we are leveling and use this town to shop". They will then say "Ok cool. We have a town council, or website is; check it out and get involved, we always need more good people!"

Now this seems really friendly, but it is a trap. What happens is you get to know the people in town, and suddenly you find yourself liking a few of them. Then you start to hate the PK's that enjoy coming to that specific town and killing everyone. Then you stop leveling because you are always being called to town to defend it. Soon you find yourself three months into the game, still a teen level character, and getting owned daily by higher level PK's.

Towns are fun and all, but they are a trap that pulls you into the web of politics. Soon it goes from town politics to world politics. Then you are running all over like a monkey trying to save the world. Listen up. Screw the world. Get your levels. Get effective. THEN worry about politics. When you can actually drive off the average moron PK and can give the big ones a run for it.


Back in the day, there were very few monarchies on Darktide. Everyone pretty much knew who was who, and you could get by fast by ID'ing for a monarch. I'm talking about when there were 400 people average on the server. These days every Tom, Dick, and Harry thinks they are the one good monarch to save the world, or ravage it for PK's. Here's a fact: Yer not. With about 50 monarchies on each side of the fence, and another 30 or so sitting in the middle, the last thing this server needs is one more great monarch.

You've done your powerleveling. You and your friends have Roger Wilco running and are starting to be a force. As a team you have taken down people well above your average level by working them as a team. People are starting to notice you big time.

Now is when you join a guild. What?? Join a guild?? But you are the big man on the block right?? Sure, in some ways. You are an effective fighting force with well made characters who work as a team and get more done than you could on your own. Why should YOU join a different monarchy??

Let me tell you something kids. We don't need 100 monarchies on each side of the fence. That's not going to make this server fun. Instead of having nice good vs. evil fights and all kinds of havoc, we are going to spend all our time getting to know each other and learning which new monarch of the week is around and wether or not we should welcome or kill them.

Instead of being another "also ran" take your solid team and find an existing monarchy that you respect. Ask to join them. Make them take you all as one. Remember that trade skill monarch you made? He is the one who swears into their guild and suddenly your team is a part of their monarchy. Don't let them break you up. They take you and your existing tree, so you can continue to powerlevel your "trade skill monarch" by feeding exp into it.

The benefits of joining another guild that already is established and stands for what you believe in are vast. The first thing is instant recognition. When I see Owain Goch, I know what kind of person I am dealing with. Same goes for Shollos. Both are good monarchies to be a part of, if they let you in. One is good, another evil. Signing on with someone like that will state clearly to the server where you stand. In addition, if you are a good team, and do work well, you will be embraced by this new guild (well the good guys will love you, I don't know if the bad guys like people killing better than them) and welcomed with open arms. Then, instead of being another "also ran" monarchy, you can be a valued and respected branch of an existing one. To me, this would be ideal.

That "Trade Mule Monarch"

By now, your trade mule monarch should have some levels from all the exp you have sent his way. In addition to the raw killing reward, the game sends more and more exp up for the length of your allegiance to a person. The longer you are sworn to them, the larger cut they get. So by the time you are well into your 20's and the 30's are looking tangible, your trade mule should start to streak up. Pump those trade skills! Oh yeah baby. Now it's mote time. Now it's Bow time. Hell it's Miller Time too. You've got a viable merchant who can service your entire new guild, another reason for them to love you.

Plus, you can pull a Sagacious and sell your services. That man isn't just smart, he's a bandit and making out well for it. If I had one wish, it wouldn't be for a reroll, it'd be for me to have thought of this earlier. I'd have me a clapper and I'd be rolling in the dough.


Well now you are established. You have a guild, you have a good "clapper" for the trade skills, and your little team is now a respected and organized force. What now? Politics baby. Fight for what your guild believes in. If you are PK that means go kill people and laugh. If you are Anti that means go kill PK's and laughs. If you are just good people perhaps that means making a town/dungeon safe for newbies. Your time to powerlevel is over. Perhaps you want to take on a few vassals and help them powerlevel so your numbers can grow. It's all up to you. You are going to have to deal with the world though, and do some politics. Unless you are a PK and you can say "screw you all". PK's have that one edge, they don't have to care. That's why Uncle Grimwell isn't a PK. Too easy, too damn easy.

Now get out there and bust some ass chump.

Grimwell of Darktide